Me? Hard headed?

Sometimes I really think so.

I've been blogging for about 3 years, and thinking/looking back I have the same issue cropping up. Surrender.


Why does it keep coming up?

Am I so hard headed that I don't learn?

Or (my preference) is God so gracious that he is teaching me slowly a deeper and deeper meaning of letting go?



Once again I find myself needing to just give it up to Him and not take it back. He is working something; I can feel it.... but I wonder how much it will hurt.
Does silver in a furnace loathe the fire and love the purity it will bring? Refining takes time to remove all the impurities.... maybe that's just where I'll be until made perfect with Him.

God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change;

courage to change the things I can;

and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;

Enjoying one moment at a time;

Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;

Taking, as He did, this sinful world as it is,

not as I would have it;

Trusting that He will make all things right

if I surrender to His Will;

That I may be reasonably happy in this life

and supremely happy with Him

Forever in the next.

Amen.
--Reinhold Niebuhr

Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will direct your paths.
Proverbs 3: 5-6

Who was Eve's helper?

Post Partum is never my shining hour. Between lack of sleep, and hormonal issues it seems that I am some one else for about 6 weeks. ;0)

In the late evening hours, when all is finally quiet, I have had time to ponder. Who helped Eve after her babies were born? You know 6 weeks of "only take care of yourself and the baby" sounds great, but can't be practical, at least not to me. Was Adam her helper? This sounds reasonable, except he did have to toil for food and for the survival of his family, right. I wonder if a tired, post partum Eve took on the tasks of everyday life "too soon" because Adam had such a hard day, and some one needed to change the older child's fig leaves, get him a drink and a snack and clean the soiled animal skins for him to sleep on. If not her, who? and she wouldn't want to ask him to do more, while she does nothing.
Of course, Adam probably told her not to "do too much" and to "get some rest." He may have even been glad to help, except maybe when it came to poopy fig leaves... no one's real glad about those.

Is this just another part of my rebelious nature? Who can rest when things need to get done? How easy is "take it easy" supposed to be? And why is it so hard to do nothing?

God Spankins

God set in place some rules, laws if you will, for our benefit.
Say Gravity. Defying the law can bring some natural consequences that are undesirable.
We call them God Spankins in our family.

Sometimes it is Mommy, and not the kids, in need of some spanking.
I've "over done it" a couple of times this week and suffered the spanking.
I think that the pain associated with "over doing it" really is necessary, since it's that which makes me slow back down! I guess I forget that I shouldn't be doing some chores, or lifting some children, until I have that painful little reminder.

God really is a loving Father to chasten His children. I wish I was one to learn without the pain, or at least not as often. ;0)

Catching Up

So much has taken place over the last week or so.... I really don't know where to start!

The move is complete! We spent our first night here on Saturday the 22nd. It was a long time coming, and it sure feels good to have so much space! Today we were blessed with visitors to help me and have a meal together. Eight people were over at one time!!! This hasn't ever happened for our family. Our home was so small that we could barely fit 2 visitors at once! It was a real blessing to me to have that option. I look forward to the possibility of hospitality!

Not much sooner than we got our bathrooms, bed rooms and kitchen settled.... Brianna Joylinn made her debut. She was born Wednesday, September 24th, 2008. Our first evening arrival, at 5:25 PM; she weighed in at 6 lbs. 10 oz. and was 19 1/2 inches long. She is pretty quiet and has allowed me to sleep more than I have allowed myself! On a couple of occasions I have let her cry a couple of minutes for the lung excercise! Everyone is so excited to have her here. Aliyah told me a couple of nights ago, "My hold it. My hold it, Mommy. Your turn all done!"

Not all changes are happy, and in the course of this week we had a sad change too. Wednesday night when hubby got home from the hospital, our dog Buster was ill. He has been a member of the family for 10+ years, and I have often teased that he is our first born. Friday, the 26th we were able to take him to the vet, since baby and I were home and my mom was able to be here for us. Tests found he had very advanced cancer and was not going to live much longer. We made the tough decision to have him put down.
He was a really great dog and we were blessed to have him for the time we did. He is dearly missed.

We have had a very difficult time greiving a loss and trying to celebrate our new little life, and the long awaited home. What was supposed to be a really happy weekend for our family turned into sort of a blur. It feels wrong to feel sad right now, but it feels wrong not to too. I don't know if that makes any sense. With postpartum hormones and all of the changes going on, I really haven't felt "myself."

I should go try to get some sleep, and not "over do" anymore for tonight.
Sorry to leave this on such a sad note, maybe I'll edit it later.